I have received this email from one of my clients and good friend. It was very interesting, so I would like to share it with you…
School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage: It’s an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through “the minds of either”
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Father: A banker provided by nature.
Criminal:A guy no different from the rest….except that he got caught.
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead
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A lady in a faded gingham dress and her husband, dressed in a
homespun threadbare suit, stepped off the train in Boston, and
walked timidly without an appointment into the Harvard University
President’s outer office.
The secretary could tell in a moment that such
backwoods, country hicks had no business at
Harvard & probably didn’t even deserve to be in
Cambridge . “We’d like to see the president,” the
man said softly. “He will be busy all day,” the
secretary snapped. “We will wait,” the lady replied.
For hours the secretary ignored them, hoping that the
couple would finally become discouraged and go away.
They didn’t, and the secretary grew frustrated and
finally decided to disturb the president, even though
it was a chore she always regretted.
“Maybe if you see them for a few minutes, they’ll leave,”
she said to him! He sighed in exasperation and nodded.
Someone of his importance obviously didn’t have the time
to spend with them, and he detested gingham dresses
and homespun suits cluttering up his outer office.
The president, stern faced and with dignity, strutted
toward the couple. The lady told him!, “We had a son
who attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy
here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed.
My husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him,
somewhere on campus.” The president wasn’t touched.
He was shocked.
“Madam,” he said, gruffly, “we can’t put up a statue
for every person who attended Harvard and died.
If we did, this place would look like a cemetery..”
“Oh, no,” the lady explained quickly. “We don’t want to
erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a
building to Harvard.”
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the
gingham dress and homespun suit, then exclaimed,
“A building! Do you have any earthly idea how
much a building costs? We have over seven and a half
million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard.”
For a moment the lady was silent.
The president was pleased. Maybe he could get rid of
them now.
The lady turned to her husband and said quietly, “Is
that all it costs to start a university? Why don’t we
just start our own? ” Her husband nodded. The
president’s face wilted in confusion and bewilderment.
Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away,
traveling to Palo Alto, California where they established
the university that bears their name, Stanford University,
a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.
You can easily judge the character of others by how
they treat those who they think can do nothing for them.
A TRUE STORY By Malcolm Forbes
I hope to keep this in mind whenever I start to judge.
Sometimes we forget the really important things in life.
Last week, I took my grand-children to a restaurant.
My six-year-old grand-son asked if he could say grace.
As we bowed our heads he said, “God is good, God is great. Thank you for the food, and I would even thank you more if Nana gets us ice cream for dessert. And liberty and justice for all! Amen!”
Along with the laughter from the other customers nearby, I heard a woman remark, “That’s what’s wrong with this country. Kids today don’t even know how to pray. Asking God for ice cream! Why, I never!”
Hearing this, my grand-son burst into tears and asked me, “Did I do it wrong? Is God mad at me?”
As I held him and assured him that he had done a terrific job, and God was certainly not mad at him, an elderly gentleman approached the table.
He winked at my grand-son and said, “I happen to know that God thought that was a great prayer.”
“Really?” my grand-son asked.
“Cross my heart,” the man replied.
Then, in a theatrical whisper, he added (indicating the woman whose remark had started this whole thing), “Too bad she never asks God for ice cream. A little ice cream is good for the soul sometimes.”
Naturally, I bought my grand-children ice cream at the end of the meal. My grand-son stared at his for a moment, and then did something I will remember the rest of my life.
He picked up his sundae and, without a word, walked over and placed it in front of the woman. With a big smile he told her, “Here, this is for you. Ice cream is good for the soul sometimes; and my soul is good already.”
The End
I love this story! The purpose of this story is not about religion but the underlying human attitude and behaviors.
Sometimes, we all need some ice cream.
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